Monday, March 7, 2011

10 years older






I remember when my mum was 45 and I said to her 'mum wow you look so good even though you're almost 50', meaning this as a compliment.She turned to me with a look of steel and said 'even 49 is very far from 50'.And today,12 years later I myself have come to realise that this is the gospel. Last September I returned to the UK to start my masters programme in International law. For some reason, I imagined that I was going to have an identical experience to my crazy 3 years as an undergraduate in London.Nothing could be further from the truth!
Back in those days, I was known as a party-rider, and this was before the expression was patented by 9ce in his song. I was partying 2 weeks before my exams,the night before a 9am shift at work. My middle initial was S for spontaneous. I had no idea what the notion of planning entailed.Schedules were a foreign word, I never experienced tiredness and if anyone's swagger needed to be gingered, I was the go-to person. The library was a social spot for us in our first and second years, in fact it was so bad that my friend Adanna used to wear a disguise in the library just so I could not find her and come and distract her.
Fast forward to 3 years after my graduation from university, and 18 months after I wrote my last examination at the Nigerian law school.I am a post graduate student and even 24 year olds are positively new borns as far as I'm concerned.I'm consumed with a burning ambition like I have never had in my life. I curse my laid back attitude whilst I was at uni and I really wish I'd done better in my 1st and 2nd years.
If only I could get into a time machine, I would go back to my summers of lounging at home, channel surfing and party hopping and do an internship. I would have devoted more time to developing my writing, penning that novel that I've dreamt about authoring since I was 10 years old.I would have sought out and read all the literary classics from Jane Eyre to Things Fall Apart to Wuthering Heights.I would have done more travelling and explored this big wide world around me which I only started doing in 2007.I'm proud to say I now have 7 countries under my belt!
My little cousin who's 17, started university in Ghana last September and the last time I went out clubbing with my flatmate in Nottingham, I was easily 8 years older than everybody on the dance floor. I could not get myself to move my body, it was a parody. Whenever someone calls me to go out, I look first at my warm bed and then at my delicious half-read novel and I answer negative. I have outgrown those days of grooving left right and centre. I am a job-seeker,I am one-half of an adult relationship, I am an invitee to the 10 year reunion at my High school and I am currently receiving queries from my grandparents about whether they will be alive when I walk down the aisle.
I think it's important to recognize that life comes in stages though. I enjoyed my youth, I tried everything at least once, I discovered myself, I changed my ideology oh at least 5 times, I made some friends, fought some and lost some. I lived on my own, then moved in with my parents. I lived abroad then lived in Nigeria, made my own money and then taxed my parents. I met the wrong boy and then met the right man.Life is a metamorphosis, we just have to embrace the next stage.